Here’s why stalking your ex on social media after a break up is always a bad idea:
It’s going to make you sad.
If you check your ex’s social media accounts following a break up, then you will be sad. This control flow statement will be the end of you. You will never in your life visit your ex’s social media accounts and feel one millionth of a degree of anything besides utter unhappiness and insecurity unless they write something along the lines of “I’m a fucking fool for ruining my one chance at happiness by being with the most incredible woman in the entire universe who loved me unconditionally and loyally despite how flawed I was as a human being. Her name is (fill in your name followed by a gut-wrenching declaration of love for you).” Considering the chances of this ever happening are one in never in your fucking life, it’s definitely a better idea for you not to bother cyber-stalking your ex.
Mostly because you’re going to be really fucking sad that they are doing everyday activities and never stopped living their life the way you thought they would. “How dare he go and spend time with his friends and go watch a movie!” “Watching movies was ‘our thing’!” “I can’t believe he went to a restaurant and ate food without me,” you’ll cry out in disbelief. “We both loved food.” Yeah — you, him, and seven billion other people in the world. You will find yourself thinking and saying borderline delusional statements. You will feel distraught, depressed, and disillusioned that this person you once shared your life with is perfectly capable of living without you.
The thing is, as easy as it is to remember the great times you had, it’s equally easy to remember why the two of you are no longer together. Obsessing over what it is they are doing with their life inhibits you from focusing on a life volumes greater and far more important — yours — and it pulls you back into fixating on what once was rather than what currently is. Furthermore, if there’s anything we’ve come to learn about Facebook and Instagram, it’s that people are simply showing you carefully edited and filtered versions of their life they’ve chosen to share. People’s social media accounts are not accurate representations of their actual life. Obsessing over and stalking your ex’s social media accounts is as productive as plotting to break up Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s marriage or planning ways you’re going to become a vampire and marry Edward Cullen.
So do yourself a favor and get off his Facebook page and/or Instagram account. Stop analyzing and breaking down every comment, like, and person tagged for deeper meanings and subtexts. There are none. Except that you're crazy. Just kidding. But seriously, acknowledge you are feeding yourself poison and engaging in unhealthy, self-destructive behavior. You have been given an opportunity and the new found time to do extraordinary things with your life. Seize it. Call a friend, go for a run, check out an art exhibit, and bask in the delight and excitement of an entirely new life this break up has afforded you.